A Grain of Sand
A Grain of Sand
Pen
©1999
All Rights Reserved
©1986 Pen
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For my beloved Clairee
I miss you more each day
There are billions and trillions of tiny grains of sand in the world. One grain of sand alone is unique. Together, these billions and trillions of tiny grains of sand create a soft, sandy beach; sometimes a bright, white beach, sometimes a tan beach. The beach is there to stop the waves from coming too far onto the shore. But the beach is also there so that people can play, have picnics, and go swimming.
One day, one tiny grain of sand realized that it was tired of being a grain of sand. All of its life as a grain of sand, it had been stepped on and kicked around. It wasn’t that the grain of sand was entirely unhappy, but it truly longed to be something more.
So the little grain of sand sent up a prayer:
“Oh, God, I know You made me a grain of sand. But my heart longs to be something more. Instead of being trampled, I would like to be treasured. Instead of being something beneath everyone’s feet, I would like to be something adored and beautiful.
“Hear my prayer, O Lord, and help me to become something special.
Amen”
And God heard the prayer sent up by the little grain of sand from the beach. And God placed the grain of sand into an oyster.
At first, it was dark and lonely inside. But, pretty soon, the grain of sand felt itself grow and change. It did not understand, but it knew that it was becoming something special.
Sure enough, the oyster opened its shell one day and the grain of sand saw its reflection in a pool of water. Only it wasn’t a grain of sand which it saw in the reflection. What it saw was something round and white and very beautiful. The grain of sand was now a pearl.
The grain of sand was very happy. It was especially happy when people admired it for its beauty. They called it a treasure and he liked the sound of that word. It liked the fact that its mere presence impressed people. Instead of being trampled on or kicked around, the grain of sand was now being looked upon with fascination and wonder.
Then one day, the grain of sand noticed that it was no longer alone. Other grains of sand had been placed into other oysters and they, too, had become beautiful pearls.
The grain of sand did not understand this. It had asked God to make it something special. If there were so many others like it, how could it be considered special?
“O Lord,” the little grain of sand prayed, “now that I am surrounded by so many others like me, I am no longer special. Why did you decide to make others special, too?”
And the Lord heard the little grain of sand which was now a pearl. And God answered.
“My child, what is it that you truly wish for? You wanted to be something more than you already were and you were already special. What more do you wish?”
The grain of sand was confused. “I don’t understand,” it said. “What do you mean that I was already special?”
“Everything I create is special in its own way,” the Lord answered. “I made you a grain of sand and a grain of sand is not nothing in itself. Did you know that, as a grain of sand, combined with wind, you have the power to change the shapes of rocks and mountains? Combined with water you can become part of a sand castle?”
“A sand castle?”
“Yes,” said the Lord. “And by yourself, you provide a cushion for bare feet on the beach. You provide a pleasant place to have a picnic. I made you a grain of sand. As a grain of sand, you were already special to Me.”
The grain of sand thought about this for a moment. “If I was already special to You, then why did You help me change?”
“Not all of My creatures are happy as they are,” the Lord said sadly. “And when they ask Me to help them change, I usually do help them change, if I think it will make them happy.”
“Is it that way with everything?”
“Yes,” said the Lord. “The cheetahs and the monkeys, the birds and the spiders. But especially with people. People are so unhappy with themselves, they usually keep Me pretty busy helping them to change.”
“But what if You don’t like them after they have changed?”
“That doesn’t matter. I will always love every living thing that I have created. For better or for worse. The important thing is, My living creatures are happy with themselves.
“I create everything with an idea in mind. Every characteristic of every living thing is a characteristic bestowed upon it by Me. When this living thing is unhappy as I have created it, it saddens me. But when this living thing turns to Me to seek help in changing, it uplifts Me to know that this living thing is willing to become something more. Mind you, its shortcomings are not shortcomings to Me. Every flaw I have instilled in a living thing is a treasure to Me. It is the flaws in life that make it life. Do you understand?”
The grain of sand took that in and thought about it for some moments. “Do You mean that, because nothing is perfect, it gives everything something to work for? To keep being better?”
“Yes,” said the Lord. “Something like that. It is the imperfections in living things that make them real. When you were a grain of sand, I was very happy. I am very happy that you are now a pearl. Provided that you are happy.”
The grain of sand gave careful thought to its answer. “Actually,” it said, “I have been thinking about that an awful lot lately. And I think that I would rather be part of a sand castle than a pearl in an oyster shell. That is, if You don’t mind helping me change back.”
“Oh, it’s never too late to change your mind,” the Lord said. “All you ever need to do, is ask. And I promise you I will do My best to see that you are what you wish to be.”
With that, the grain of sand returned to the beach as a grain of sand.
And the very next day, the grain of sand found itself part of a huge, beautiful sand castle.
About the Author
Bitten by the writing bug at the age of ten, Pen is an avid reader in addition to being a prolific writer. A native Georgian she lived in Hollywood, California for a year and a half (pursuing Film Studies – an interesting distraction) and six weeks in Asheville, NC (attempting to get herself together).
Influenced by the world around her, Pen writes whatever comes into her fuzzy little red head (currently Vidal Sassoon Merlot Vibrant Red). She writes in no specific genre as she has a variety of interests and passions about which to write.
Pen has suffered from Hidradenitis Suppurativa most of her adult life. However, she was not diagnosed with this affliction until 2012 due to the ignorance of the medical profession. She hopes to receive medical treatment soon for Stage 3 HS.
Pen resides in the Atlanta, Georgia area where she spends as much time as possible writing. She is currently awaiting adoption by a new feline/felines.
She may be contacted via the contact form on her website www.pensen.wix.com/neros-fiddle. You may also visit www.penspen.wix.com/hswarrior.
Respectfully,
Pen
From the Author
Dear Reader:
I suffer from an affliction known as Hidradenitis Suppurativa, also known as HS or Acne Inversa. You’ve
probably never heard of it. That’s okay. Neither have most doctors.
HS is a foul skin condition where huge lumps form beneath the skin in sensitive areas: beneath arms and breasts, along the groin and buttocks. These lumps can grow to be as large as golf balls. They drain constantly and are painful to the point of limiting mobility and debilitation.
HS is not contagious. The cause is unknown and there is no cure. Currently, there is no research being conducted into finding a cure.
This malady not only attacks on a physical level, it assaults a person’s emotional and mental states as well. Embarrassment, shame, guilt, depression, isolation, loss of self-worth and self-esteem prevent many people from even discussing their illness.
Conservative estimates state that between 1% and 4% of the world’s population suffers from HS. That doesn’t sound like much, until you crunch the numbers: anywhere from 74,000,000 to 296,000,000 people. To put this into perspective, the population of the United States is 318,000,000.
Theoretically, HS has the power to cripple an entire nation.
I state the estimates are conservative because many people are misdiagnosed due to doctors not understanding or even knowing about Hidradenitis Suppurativa. And there are people too embarrassed or ashamed to discuss this condition with their doctors.
There is no test to determine HS because there is no research. There is no research because there is little awareness of HS among the population and little compassion for HS patients in the medical community.
And it is a vicious cycle.
Despite the debilitation of this illness, many of us HS sufferers do our best to maintain some semblance of a normal life. We go about our daily routine despite the pain, not only from our own determination, but because it is expected of us. For whatever reason, many people refuse to believe how painful and debilitating these lumps are. They don’t understand how we may not appear sick but inside we are exhausted and in pain.
We call ourselves Warriors because we fight daily to have as normal lives as possible.
There is a good chance, dear reader, that you know someone who suffers from HS. And yet you may not even be aware of it.
Please learn about this affliction. And if you do know someone, please offer them compassion and understanding for what they are enduring.
And be thankful you yourself do not endure it.
Because I wouldn’t wish HS on anyone.
Thank you.
Respectfully,
Pen
www.hsawareness.org
www.hssupport.org
www.penspen.wix.com/hswarrior
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www.penspen.wix.com/neros-fiddle
www.penspen.wix.com/hswarrior
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To learn more about Hidradenitis Suppurativa (a debilitating affliction I and millions of others struggle with daily), visit
www.hsawareness.org
www.hssupport.org
www.penspen.wix.com/hswarrior